Self-Trust Rehab #6 - Learning to Trust Your Inner Yes (and Your Inner Hell No)

 

Your body knows. Your gut knows. That “yes” that lights you up? That “nope” that makes your stomach turn? Those are signals, not suggestions.

But if you were trained to second-guess yourself, or taught that other people’s comfort mattered more than your truth, you might ignore those signals.

Have you ever agreed to something when deep down, you knew you wanted to say no? Or felt a spark of excitement about an opportunity, but talked yourself out of pursuing it? We all have moments where our inner compass tries to guide us, yet we tune it out, convinced our heads know better than our hearts. Trusting your intuition is one of the most transformative skills you can develop in your personal growth journey. Recognizing your inner yes and your inner hell no is about coming home to yourself and honoring the wisdom that has always been there.

Let’s picture a common scenario: You receive an invitation to a gathering. Instantly, your body contracts, shoulders tense, and you feel a weight in your chest. Still, you hear yourself replying, “Sure, I’ll be there!” This disconnect between your true feelings and your outward response happens to all of us. Learning to recognize and respect these inner signals is where self-trust begins. When you practice listening to your own yes and no, you break free from people-pleasing, guilt, and resentment.

Why Signals Matter

Your body is constantly sending you intuitive signals, even when your mind is full of doubts or overthinking. That flutter in your stomach when you’re excited or the heaviness in your chest when you’re dreading something, these are your built-in guidance systems trying to steer you toward what’s right for you. We often think saying no is rude or selfish, especially if we’re used to putting others first. But, in reality, saying no is an act of deep wisdom and self-care. It’s not about shutting people out, it’s about honoring your limits and energy so you can show up authentically.

Try reframing the idea of “no” as a boundary that protects your well-being, not as an offense to someone else. Imagine a friend inviting you to a late-night event when you know you need rest. By choosing to say no, you’re respecting your own needs, and that’s a powerful form of self-respect. When you listen to your inner signals, you start to build trust with yourself, making choices that align with your real desires instead of what’s expected.

How to Tune In

So, how can you start tuning in to these signals? Begin by paying attention to the physical sensations that arise when you’re faced with decisions. Notice if your body feels open and relaxed, or tense and constricted. A “yes” might feel like a breath of fresh air, a lightness in your chest, or a curious energy that makes you want to lean in. A “no” might feel like a knot in your stomach, a slumping posture, or a desire to withdraw. These bodily cues are valuable messages, not random reactions.

Instead of immediately responding to requests or opportunities, give yourself a moment to check in. Ask yourself, “What is true for me right now?” rather than “What is expected?” One simple exercise is to place your hand on your heart, take a deep breath, and ask, “Is this a yes or a no for me?” Practicing this in small, everyday choices like deciding what to eat or which invitation to accept helps you strengthen your self-trust muscle over time.

Building the Muscle

Like any new skill, learning to trust your intuition takes practice. Start by saying no early and often to things that don’t align with your inner yes. Notice how it feels to respect your own boundaries, even if it’s uncomfortable at first. With time, it gets easier, and you’ll likely find yourself feeling lighter, more energized, and more authentic in your interactions.

Follow your excitement instead of obligations whenever possible. For instance, if you feel drawn to a creative project or an unexpected adventure, allow yourself to pursue it, even if it doesn’t fit into your usual routine. Real-life examples might include declining an extra work assignment to preserve your energy, or choosing a quiet night in over a crowded party simply because that’s what your body needs. Each time you honor your true yes or no, you reinforce the trust between you and yourself.

Journal Prompts for Self-Discovery

• What does a genuine “yes” feel like in my body? Describe a recent memory when you felt it.
• Can I recall a time I ignored my no and regretted it? What did I learn?
• Where in my life can I begin to honor my no, even in small ways?

Use these prompts to reflect and uncover patterns in your decision-making. Journaling can reveal insights that guide you toward greater self-trust and clarity.

Conclusion: Growth Through Aligned Choices

Building self-trust doesn’t happen overnight. It’s a process of making small, aligned choices and letting your body lead you back to your own truth. Every time you listen to your inner signals and act on them, you reinforce the belief that you can depend on yourself. Be gentle as you learn to tune in and remember that your inner yes and no are here to guide you toward a more authentic, fulfilling life. You have the wisdom within you, trust it, and let it light your way forward.